I'm a Jay Fan

I'm a re-converted Jay fan. Big one. It was the after effects of the concert that Saturday that just ended. I'm surfing all over for his info, I'm going crazy. But I have someone to keep me accompany along the way. We're turning into 15 year olds once again. And who's to say that that is bad?

Survived

It was amazing. We survived! I survived. With flying colours. It was almost unbelievable but it happened. Conclusion. Laziness doesn't pay though quick thinking does help.

Jay's Concert - 27th Nov 2004

Though I woke up to a horrible morning coz of that evil man, I had to say that I was still looking forward to my first ever concert. I'm from the mountain, and have never ever been to any concerts before. Went to suntec for some NYDC - though was trying to swear off pasta for 2 month after the "plump chicken" incident - then off to Sunshine Plaza for some One Piece Zorro candy toys and Bugis for more candy toys to try to pass some time before the main event. Hurried off to Kallang MRT at about 7.15pm. I'm getting excited. Followed the crowd upon reaching the station and walked to Indoor stadium and am starting to perspire ALOT. Never knew Indoor was so far from the station. It's about 7.50pm when we finally reached. Crowds are building up. Heartbeat is still normal. Not so excited now but am looking forward to see how it'll be like. Got in through the East gate. Where are our seats? Huh? The second last row? What kind of $128 tickets are these? Second last row??? I demand a refund!! And huh?? The words "JAY" on the stage seemed to be facing the West and not to mention that we seemed to be facing the back of the band instruments too. Are we destined to see his butt from such a distance for the next 2 hours or so for $128 each? REFUND!! Messaged Yiling to ask her whereabouts. She has not reached yet. She's stuck in a cab, in a jam and trying to control her pee at the same time. Somehow, I rather she never reached coz when she finally did, we realized that she had a so much better view, if at an angle. She has a better view at $30 less! Have to yell to remind Jay that the people in the middle pay more thus he has to limit his time at the corners of the stage, especially the corner on the East side coz Yiling sounded so happy!!! People are screaming. I don't know why. Seems that some people near the black tunnel they pulled out to connect to the stage, saw Jay walking in and his head bobbing up and down - I only got to know this after I read a review this afternoon. How he came from the west corner, entered from the bottom of the stage and finally came down from about 2 storeys high I'll never know. Magic? More like technology. But how? I almost thought that he has been standing up there since 7.30pm waiting for the correct timing to come down. Music started. In the name of the father, my heart is beating faster than normal. Concert started. Hey! When did those 3 red curtains fall off? Damn where was I looking? Didn't see the actual falling till after I saw the pathetic short video ren captured on his cybershot for XiaoYe. Didn't know he was on the cross till much later. Heck I didn't even know there was a big white cross floating down. What was I doing?? Must be the excitment. Ren commented that I'm really from the mountain. Probably that's why I didn't know where to look. Well, maybe I should blame it on the groupies. I felt like an 80 year old ah ma beside those groupies. They wave their colored glow in the dark sticks non stop for the entire concert without their arms ever falling off, screamed, yelled, stood up and got excited over every stupid, lame, wonderful, funny, fast, slow songs/moment. What is the world turning into. I sit there laughing at their lameness. I AM old. The sound system sucked big time. The bass was too strong, far too loud. Couldn't hear him clearly. Things finally settled down when he sang the slower ones, the unplugged was great. He had a good voice afterall. Played the flute during one of the first few songs. Ok, so he knows instruments other that guitar and piano. Played rather well too. Makes me wanna pick up flute too and add that to my other music playing talent - radio and ipod. He danced? Jay danced? Ok I'm impressed. That's something really new. He sang the words to Dad, I'm Home with the music to Rice Fields. Wow! I'm really impressed now. That IS cool. He sang Quiet. He finally sang Quiet. Ren was so excited. He has been waiting for that the whole night. That's the only complete song that he knows how to sing. His all time favourite. Ren took out his handphone and started recording it after I showed him what the groupie in front of us was doing. He recorded a total of 7 songs I think. It was a mess of screams and sssssssssssssss...... when we played back later. Where was Jay's voice? In the midst of all that. Had to strain the ears to find it. Had a good laugh about it though. The plump curly hair guy who came out singing "Oh my dear cows, where are you?" during Rice Field was hilarious I couldn't stop laughing. I almost fell off my seat when Jay *makes some DJAYing noise* went "Xin Jia Po" *makes some DJAYing noise* and "Xin Jia PO" again. It was soooo lame but apparantly the groupies thought it was endearing. Liked the fat guy from Nan Quan Mama, he sings well. Like his lazy voice. I'm a sucker for lazy voices. Landy was scary. I had to look away. What was she doing? Selling pork at a wet market? Gosh! The last thing I expected at this concert was something like that. She was wearing bits of clothing - little bits - shaking her booty like nobody's business and sticking like plaster on a male dancer and stuff. To Landy "Please stop doing that. I appreciate your professionalism as a special guest but it's a bit erm...scary especially in front of such a huge young crowd. Ok I have an 80 year old mind and so what? Keep that down will you? An ah ma like me can't take it and ask that guy to crawl elsewhere please." Was disappointed they didn't duet Rooftop but maybe they were just trying to surprise the audience by not doing what we expected. Was glad that Jay decided to shed those strange clothings he had on and lame performances from his last concert - ah ma like me lived on the mountain and watched it in DVD - and wore nice, normal, decent clothing - I'm old I told you. The groupies in front of me are driving me crazy. Hey!! You don't have to stand all the way you know? By the way, do you know that you're really tall and me right behind you, am really short? I dread the times Jay comes over to the East side. There he is right in front, straight ahead but I had to look at the screen coz I'm blocked by the ever-standing-whenever-he's-near groupies. I see him more clearly when he's standing at the East corner. Heck! Isn't there where Yiling is? My mind is in a mess. Should I yell for him, send some psi messages to him and get him to move away from the $98 area or let him remind there so I can catch a better view of his body? - Yup! His body. I can't see his face. I'm that far away and that's him holding the mike right? Don't tell me I've been looking at the wrong person the whole night. The pink piano performance was cool too serves as a reminder to me that I'll never be able to play one coz my fingers are too slow and only meant for typing on keyboards like now. There were 2 or 3? encores. This guy is really full of himself. How many times must he make the crowd yell his name. Well, I didn't. I'm an old ah ma. Sometimes I suspect he wrote the song, Grandma for me. Didn't sing it last night though. Sang Granddad's Tea instead. Think he prefers elderly males to females. He just had to sing Common Orange Jasmine. How can he not? He requested all us to sing together with him. He'll be so disappointed to know that there's a person in the huge crowd that can only sing the title itself, nothing else and he's sitting next to me, holding my right hand on our 25th month anniversary.

Evil People

My lousy neighbor came over with an ultra black face that says "I wanna kill you and burn your house down" this morning. It took a long time before we realized that it was him and let him accuse our dog of dirtying his area with smelly and unhygienic urine??!! Our furball?? My mum offered to wash the area outside his flat for him. He said it was ok and he has already washed it. So told us not to bother. Mum asked ren to go take a look outside to see if he has really washed the floor coz furball wasn't out in the morning so it couldn't have been him. Ren went out and unluckily met that horrible man. Ren smiled and asked him if the small puddle of yellow liquid outside his flat was the one he was talking about. He got angry and raised his voice and continued to raise it louder as if he wanted to show off his "powerful" voice. As it got louder, his language got dirtier too - talking about unhygienic. Pa got angry and went out of the house to want to ask him to stop scolding my ren. He lowered his volume down abit but continued his accuse. I went out. Tried to pull ren away and told him to shut his mouth and return to my home. The guy got worse with his accuse. I told him that our dog didn't do that. He got angry and said his wife heard the dog going over in the morning at 7+am. I told him that nobody's up at 7+am so he changed to 8am. Actually furball was out at 6.30am but on the other side of the floor and definitely not outside his house. Thereafter for no reason whatsoever, he scolded me. Vulgarities. Ren was furious and ended up wanting to beat up the guy for scolding me. My face was red. I wanted to kill him. The basic rule for a quarrel is no vulgarities. To end things, had to still pull ren away. Mum came out at this time. Pa was impressive. He was calm. Pa and mum tried to reason with him and finally got him to shut up and apologize for his dirty language. (1) Pa always help them and my next door neighbor wash their corridor when he's washing ours. (2) We always clean up after furball. (3) There's dogs upstairs too - when he said that we're only people with dogs on this floor. My next door neighbor came out to cool things down too. He even asked the guy what was the white power that he has been pouring all over the staircase next to his flat. He actually had the cheek to reply that it was the power for washing sinks and all that stuff. How can this guy and his wife be so evil???? If furball and us were wrong. If furball had really dirtied his corridor a few times - though we cleaned up immediately - do they have to do that? The dog could have died from poison if he licks it up from the floor knowing how dogs love to lick. Anybody going up or coming down the staircase area might have fallen down coz the floor was too slippery. Any other animals running up and down the stairs might have been poisoned too. This is really evil. Don't they think before they tried such things? It is plain cruel. Dogs have lives too. They have feelings, habits and such too. The next time he starts a quarrel again, I would ask him a question. When his daughter grows up and starts running along the corridor, what if we, irritated by the mere presence and sound of happy laughter and place cactuses outside our house?

29th Nov

Come Monday, 29th Nov 2004, all of us, one by one, are gonna die slow and terrible deaths. Maybe not all, but I'm in and so is Mae. Slow and terrible.

What Happened

I'm a nobody. Doesn't anybody get that?? Do I have to point a gun at their heads to make sure they understand nobody reports to a nobody and I simply don't know anything. Being here 4 months earlier than the rest doesn't mean I'll know every bot and nut in this place and every single history that has ever happened before. Being 4 months earlier doesn't guarantee me being more knowledgeable, wiser and such. I'm frustrated. I don't know how to deal anymore. Everything and everyone is a DUH in IMPACT, bold and font size 72. I'm really irritated. Get me out of this damn place. I'm going crazy. I'm no longer happy. All happiness in my life has fled. What happened? I was unhappy with the management but overall still happy with my life here coz I had friends, coz I had happy times, coz I was enjoying myself nonetheless. What happened to those happy elements? What happened? I lost all happy vibes. I'm an empty shell of what I used to be. There's no sharing of jokes, laughter, work and stuff anymore. I don't even know what I'm doing anymore. I don't like anything. I'm depressed. I need to get out. What is the world turning into? I NEED OUT! I truly, truly dislike this place to the tip and the bottom. What is wrong? What has happened? I don't know who I am or what I am anymore. I'm nobody. And strangely, nobody understood that. Maybe they do but they just didn't care either.

Chicken Cannelloni

There's a craze for pasta today. A Need. Plump chicken-filled pasta topped with alfredo sauce & mozzarella cheese. When is Yiling coming back with my "plump chicken"???

Reality

I'm waking up to reality every morning now. Reality says I'm simply a lazy bum that doesn't know the left and right of life. It says that I can go walking around in cycles but I'll never find that correct path to take. It doesn't matter the amount of time I spent thinking, finding. I'm getting nowhere coz there is no "where". Why is it that I can't just join in the rat race and become a normal, healthy part of the society? Why do I have to try to find that "where" when there is nothing for me in sight? It is tough. Maybe my "where" is the happiness that I've been trying to hold on to.

38.7C

So much talk abt being sick is normal now and so on. Damn damn damn. My fever is back. The thermometer says 38.7C. Am I dreaming? I think its lying. The aircon in our room has already been adjusted to 27C and I'm still hot and cold, hot and cold. Damn!! I want my weekend!! Everyone is sick!! Yiling has gone home coz she's sick for like days... Peisze's nose is running away and she's desperately trying to hold on to it at home. Mae is so far healthy for now. She's so strong! But kinda sick in the mind coz she's stressing over other things. Yvonne doesn't look well either. BUT! BUT! I should be ok. Damn I don't want fever again. My cough disappeared but my fever is back!! What is going on?????

Dangerously Half Closed Eyes

Two pairs of dangerously half closed eyes. Two pairs of eyes dangerously on the verge of forever closing for the day. I'm trying my very best to keep awake. Trying by coughing, by listening to Jay, by erm...blogging. Mae is also trying very hard. By msning, by listening to Jay, by sending sms online. It's only 1:14pm. How many hours is that to 6pm?

Sick Season

It's sick season now ren. It's ok to fall sick. I've been taking good care of myself and so have you. I'm not a robot or a superhuman. When it's time to fall sick, I will and I can. I got sick, I will get well. I'm not suffering. I'm just normally sick. That means sick in the normal season, sick in the normal way - in this case bad flu. All I need are care and concern, all I need is for you to bring me to the doctor and remind me to take medication. I will get well, I don't need your worries.

Piscean

I'm a true Piscean. I feed on emotions and vomit logic up river. Vice versa down river.

Depression

My eyes have not closed since 1.30am. I was staring at the clock counting down... 2.30am, 3.30am, 4.30am, 5.30am, 6.45am, 6.46am, 6.47am, 6.48am...till my mum comes a knocking at my door. I'm depressed. I wanna get out of this pithole. This quicksand as Mae puts it. I'm so backdated. I wanna get in front again. I wanna start moving. I wanna go on. Let me go on. Let me go. I needa emerge from this hellhole alive.

The Race

In the Hare and Turtle race, I'm the Hare. Not just due to preference in the animal - or rather non preference for certain cold blooded, 4 legged, hard shelled back creature - but the similarity in our characteristics. Like the Hare, I rush, hop and sprint at the start of every race. And like the Hare, I stopped just before the finishing point to rest, to look and to behold. I never believe the story coz I always thought the Hare was stupid and the cold blooded creature was simply despicable. Now I believe coz I am the Hare. I behave exactly the same way. But for certain races, I wanna win too. The Hare should win. The Hare can win.

The Last Day

Second day of my MC and hopefully the last of my extremely long weekend. I just realized that others work 5 days a week - ok 4 days this week - and rest for 2 days while I rest for 5 days and work 2 days. Apart from the immense suffering and the can't get out off bed situation, I pride myself with the fact that at least I'm at home in my cosy room trying to keep awake while other try to at their desktops, behind their monitors. Heh heh really, horribly sick but not such a bad bargain after all. And I think I lost a bit of weight :) Ok time to sleep. My medication's taking effect again. YAWN.

A Pugilistic Career

For the last few nights, I always felt as if I were living in the chinese martial arts era. My palms and feet were blazing hot. I felt as if flame could emerge from them anytime. My head felt so light and giddy, I think I'm kinda floating in the mid air. I can somehow imagine myself walking on water, light and deft. Though my eyeballs hurt and I could not open them, I could feel my surroundings and every movement with my ears and skin - that is if I don't fall asleep from exhaustion or get drowsy from medication first.

The Sign

I think I'm never getting well. Then again, I might get a longer holiday coz of it. Hmm...i wonder if that's a good sign?

Still

I'm still sick. Feverish hot. Coughing. Weak at the limbs. Is this how I'm gonna have to spend the entire holiday?

Not Good

I woke up this morning -----------not good----------- I went out in the noon -----------not good----------- I went home early noon -----------not good----------- I missed Buskers' Fest -----------not good----------- I'm sick. On the first day of the 3 day long weekend.

Bimbo Resurfacing

I wonder if it's a good sign - I hope it is. I think it is. Ok. I'm sure it is. I realized that my bimbo self is resurfacing again. I've been talking about Qi Yu Wu's boobs for the past...erm...2 hrs? (ok not keep talking but on and off, on and off for the past 2 hrs) And now Starusticity's suggesting that we add in Legolas's granite butt for discussion and I'm erm...agreeable.

There are no Cats under the Bridges in Asia

Nor are there any in the Ocean called Paradise. Ok ok I know, I know. I'm just being very lame here. But then it's a Friday, yesterday was Happy Happy Deepavali and the next 3 days are holidays so how can anyone expect me to be anything but lame? And it's a fact. All the cats are gone. Everyone however is as usual working extremely hard under such circumstances. Ok, not everyone. I'm blogging and well...some Starusticity is playing net games. My left thumb is tired. Tired from pressing onto the Ctrl key on my keyboard while I repeatedly tried to send an email to people such as meepok, ahboy, ahbeng, solosolo and tigerbug. Heck! The email bounced again. So it's back to meepok, ahboy, ahbeng, solosolo, tigerbug and 1000 more others again. Wonder if I should send one to coconutboy just for the fun of it...

YAY!

Tomorrow is Deepavali!! No work tomorrow!!

Gloomy

It's a lousy day. Another lousy day. Nobody did anything to me. Not waking up on the wrong side of bed coz there's only 1 side of my bed to wake up from. Just lousy. Everything, everybody gets on my nerves.

The Need

I'm dying. I really am. Look at the time. It's 5 more long mintues to 6pm. I can't keep up with this struggle anymore. I'm wasting my time. I NEED time to speed up. I NEED the time to be 6 NOW. I NEED! The time is 5:56pm now. 4 more long long minutes.

Eyes Half Opened

It's a good day. It's a bad day. What the heck??!! I don't even know how to label this day. It's a bad day. I'm soooo tired that I couldn't keep my eyes open even if my life depended on it. It's a good day. I'm lucky that I didn't have to do much work today and I'm being left alone most of the time. It's a bad day. I haven't done anything for the past erm...6? hours. It's a good day. I haven't done anything for the past 6 hours.

Short MSN Extract

Another extract from MSN. This time a short one. Counting Down...2 Days! http://fionteoh.blogspot.com is obviously Fion and Star Fish is me. Counting Down...2 Days! http://fionteoh.blogspot.com says: just now we went for lunch, yana ask how come we dun wanna buy maggie mee eat in office. i say not healthy then Mr Y say got a research on a mice to eat maggie mee for a week. then the mice died Counting Down...2 Days! http://fionteoh.blogspot.com says: then mr philip say perhaps the mice dun wanna eat maggie mee so stuff to death muahaha Star Fish says: hahahahahahaahahaha

Sneezes

I've been sneezing and sneezing constantly since last week. Haven't been feeling too good, yet I haven't been feeling too bad either - Physically. My mental health hasn't been good since a long long time ago, since I stopped being a bimbo. Why can't my body just stop fighting and let me be sick? Rightfully sick. Correctly sick. I should be. I've been sneezing. What's the point of sneezing if I can't exchange that for an MC? Is that too much to ask? Starusticity is sneezing too. I counted. 3 times. Big sneezes.

Saturday

Another Jinxed Saturday just as the Saturday before and the one before that. I'm starting to wonder if I was ever right at all in looking forward to Saturdays now. "Saturday" seemed to be an extension of Friday and a hoax to fool the mind into thinking that Friday has truly ended. I'm finally convinced. Saturday never really existed. There are only 6 days in a week.

Friday

I dread the days, the ones in the week. They're long and dreadful. The minutes crawl, the hours stood still. I always thought I'll see my hair in a lighter shade, each time I hurry through the doors and to the bus. My day starts gloomy each time I open my eyes and realize that it's a weekday. Is it Friday yet? Yeah, it is. But is Saturday ever gonna come? I really do not know. I hope it will. Coz even the sun is brighter on a Saturday.

Motivation

I need motivation. Not motivation for work. Motivation to get over today. Today is far to long and it shouldn't be. Where is Rusty? Where is my ToriQ?

Cheese

I'm still searching for my goal in life. The path to take. The way to go. Fion says that we have to make our marks on the walls like mice to make sure that we never come back to the same spot again. To ensure that we get to our cheese someway, somehow. I'm leaving marks on almost every wall. My problem seemed to be not knowing which cheese to pick up instead of not being able to find any cheese. I'm picking cheese at every spot. They taste all the same, yet still different. Should I keep going till I find THE cheese but will I even? What is THE cheese anyway? By the way, the tomcats and pussycats have all gone out.

Thursday

It's a stony day. I juz feel that way. I wake up this morning not wanting to move, not wanting to talk, not wanting to think. Tashes look like a rock today. Not much emotions, due to 2 much feelings. Not able to move. Not able to talk. Unable to think. Is stones a new type of sickness? Does it spread to those around you? The sky is gloomy. I wonder if it'll rain again today.

Wednesday

Not too stress today. Ok I have work to do but it's not so stressful. I'm sure kind readers of this blog has come to realized that on peaceful days like this, my blog is boring and boring and boring. Bought 2 One Piece comics last evening and cried myself to sleep reading it. 400 years of friendship between 2 men - not gay! - is oh so touching. Went to a website that sells such cute lip balms http://www.lipmedic.com - recommended by Starusticity. I like the brand "It's Happy Bunny". It says, Step 1: Apply Lip Gloss Step 2: Kiss My Butt Step 3: Repeat the Above Rejected kind offers from colleague to ta bao my beloved Mac back for me. Tashes can't get tickets to Mel for her graduation at all. Is depressed and thinking of swimming over. I'm imagining her looking like a dry prune when she comes back home. Fion is going for interview this evening and is totally unprepared and unconfident about it. Hope she does well though.

Tuesday

The 3 of us came in today wearing simliar stuff and decided that we're changing our directions again. No more bimbos, no more spice gals whatsoever. We're the gal band SHE.

Monday

Rusty says I'm "short and lonely" when I said I was "short of money". I'm drinking a can of 7-up tropical, a freebie from the KFC delivery. My hair is neither blue nor purple yet so I'm still a bimbo wannabe. Tashes is trying to be punk though her new do makes her such barbie. Jacqie is counting down to another 9 days. The sky is puking rain. Here we go again, juz another upsetting Monday and a lame attempt at updating my blog