Jill and the Bean Stalk

This is rich, probably the amazing fact of the year. For those who has yet heard it - breathe people in case you choke on something upon hearing - my 5 year niece almost had an operation to remove a bean stalk, sprout, dou gay, whatever you name it out from her tiny ear. Yes, you heard it right here. A dou gay plant. The dou gay you see when you eat char kuay tiao, fish ball noodle. Story starts like this, my mum spotted her furiously digging her ear around noon yesterday and curiously asked what she was so obviously doing. And luckily for mum asking the obvious, realized that she was bleeding slightly in the outer rims of her ear. Niece pleaded with mum to help her "dig for worms" - her term for removing ear wax the traditional way with a stick with scope. Thing is, she has been pestering mum and ah ma to help her dig those "worms" every single day for days now and those "worms" seemed to just keep coming. Half way through the digging, I guess she might just be feeling helpless, she told my mum in a matter of fact manner "I put something inside" innocently!!! What next of coz is a series of phone calls to my sis informing her of the curious incident so recently discovered and what's in that ear quizzes throughout dinner and tv time. Sis wasn't all that worried at first, afterall this wasn't the first time something like that happened to one of the kids at home - heartless isn't her? though I laughed too - till the doctor inform her that her daughter might have to be operated on coz it seems impossible to remove it now that there's infection occurring within the ear - a green bean with water and fertilizer what do you expect? Fortunately for her, the doctors came up with another method of removal. What instrument was involved I do not know but sucking was the word that I was given. And boy those suckers sure did their job well. My cousin and I had done similar stuff before - I shoved a bead up my nostril and was almost operated on till a kind doctor at Alexandra Hospital removed it with a silver stick. my cousin, clearly more adventurous, had kept a q-tip cotton bud for a month in her ear, swallowed a majong chip which might be the suspicious reason for her constant constipation and shoved also a bead in her nose, which she managed to remove it out herself - but my niece won the encounters with alien objects competition hands down. None of our alien objects grew out of their original proportion. Her reasoning was logical if not a little scary. Apparently, her class was out digging for green beans that they planted in the school garden - teacher was teaching them how to plant their first plants - and having no pockets in her uniform, she carefully wrapped the precious bean in tissue and shoved it into her ear in case she lose it. And we know, she did not coz she kept it safely there for almost 6 months. Heck! I bet the bean even celebrated New Year with her. I heard my sis brought back the tiny dou gay plant and it's sitting in a container in our kitchen right at this moment. Someday I might just take a picture of it. Something to present to her little friends in years to come. At least I was smarter, I threw away my bead. One thing's for sure, I'll never look at a dou gay in the same way again.